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How to Make Friends When you Have Social Anxiety

Oct 2, 2024

Making new friends can feel daunting at the best of times. When you have social anxiety, however, it can feel even more difficult. You may feel overwhelmed by gatherings of new people or even struggle to get out of the house. With the right support and a plan in place, however, you can overcome social anxiety issues and find it easier to make those much-needed connections.

Best Practices for Talking to Others When You Have Social Anxiety

Thinking through your interactions with others ahead of time can make it easier to manage symptoms of social anxiety successfully. Keep these ideas in mind.

• Actively listen when you’re talking to others. Pay attention to what they have to say, then respond based on what they’ve said, rather than planning out your next statement while the other person is talking.
• Make connections with others by considering shared interests.
• Consider getting to know people in smaller groups or more intimate settings first, decreasing social anxiety and making it easier to interact.
• Strive to speak expressively and share more information rather than sharing only a few words or phrases when you speak. Sharing more information can make it easier for others to connect with you.

Try to practice going into social situations regularly. While it may not remove symptoms of social anxiety entirely, it can make it easier to connect and engage with others–and the more you do it, the easier you may find it.

Make a Plan to Deal with Your Emotions

The emotions surrounding social interactions can feel overwhelming when you have social anxiety, both in the moment and later when you go back over those moments. Create a plan that acknowledges your social anxiety concerns and allows you to effectively deal with those emotions. Your plan may include elements like:

• Identifying what you have felt in past social situations, including how specific interactions have made you feel or what they have called up.
• Analyzing social situations from an outside viewpoint, allowing you to get more distance from the interaction and evaluate it effectively.
• Creating an action plan that will allow you to deal with those emotions.
• Talk with a therapist if needed.

If you’re struggling to deal with the social anxiety that pops up when you’re interacting with others, especially when you’re meeting new people, be gentle with yourself. You may want to start with smaller gatherings or provide yourself with an exit plan so that if social anxiety gets overwhelming, you can leave the situation. Give yourself grace! Remember, a single negative social interaction does not have to be catastrophic.

Try to regularly expose yourself to new types of social situations. Learn how each makes you feel, including which situations make you the most comfortable or uncomfortable and look for new opportunities to interact with others. Over time, you’ll find that these situations become easier. It can also be easier to deal with them, in general, when you have a better idea of how you will react in different settings.

Getting Help for Social Anxiety

If you suffer from symptoms of social anxiety, especially if you feel those symptoms worsening, do not try to handle them on your own. Instead, seek out support from a qualified counselor who can help you identify social anxiety triggers, understand your emotions, and work through those symptoms so that you can experience healthier interactions and make new friends. Be prepared to ask for help from friends and loved ones if needed.

Whether you’re wondering what to do when you have no friends or struggling with social awkwardness and disconnection, Mental Health Systems is here to help. Reach out today to schedule your first session.

Image Credit: Jacob Lund / Shutterstock